One of my greatest fears is to ruin my kids with my parenting. You don’t have to be a parent to understand that fear. But when you are one, it just makes it more visceral, possible—real. I’ve got two sons. They’re great. They love to play, roughhouse, laugh—all the good stuff kids typically do. There…More
Tag Archives: parenting
Is remote learning hurting my kid?
The school year kicked off and it’s nerve wracking. Many classrooms are empty and our living rooms have replaced them. Our kids are sitting in front of a device all day, and they aren’t physically interacting with anyone. They’re remote learning. And we, parents, are wondering, Will our kids remotely learning anything? And let’s face…More
Should I Get the COVID-19 Vaccine?
Headlines about vaccines are splattered all over the media these days. We, all of us, are on our toes with expectation, waiting for one to work. But we may be reaching. And even if one works, that doesn’t mean it’s safe. When I was younger, before this pandemic, I never thought about vaccines. When my…More
The Best Thing About Our Baby Having a Cleft Lip and Palate
Our son was born with a birth defect called a cleft lip and palate. This happens when the lip and roof of a baby’s mouth doesn’t fully close up in the womb creating a gap, thus the “cleft.” During almost all of the pregnancy, we went about our lives completely unaware of it. Finding About…More
Get things done when working from home (even with kids)
Working from home can sound fantastic, with all of that freedom and no commute, but it’s not always easy. Sometimes it can feel impossible. But it’s not. Yes, you get to roll out of bed and be at your desk in a couple of steps without even needing to put a shred of clothing on…More
Cleft repair surgery and coronavirus—a story
It was a beautiful morning in the city, with spring in the air and magic around every corner. But for me, New York didn’t blossom in my eyes; it was different for us. I was taking our nine-month-old baby in for surgery. He had a cleft palate (and lip, but that was already repaired). A…More
True strength
True strength isn’t about how much weight you can throw around in the gym; rather, it’s about your ability to carry the burdens of others. It’s certainly not about how many people you can hurt, but it’s about those you can heal. The strongest of us shouldn’t spend our energy trying to control anyone else…More
Fatherhood: Reflections on the last days of summer with my son
Popcorn, beer, and fans in blue surrounded us. Summer sun was beating down; a cool wind comforted us; and the crowd roared when a homerun soared over the back wall. His face glowed with hope and joy as we sat: My son and I perched in the Bronx. He knew that I didn’t like staying…More
How New Yorkers react to our five pound baby
New York can be a hard place. People are rushing around you, treating you as if you weren’t human, only something in their way. The bustle can be overwhelming. You can get lost in the shuffle and feel like a number. But living here with a family has been very different, especially with a newborn.More
The Saturday afternoon we lost our son
It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon, and we were in Washington Square Park, the iconic park in downtown Manhattan. The large marshmallow clouds marched in rows over the skyline; there was a slight breeze that brought comfort from the warmth of the sun shining down on the sea of humanity. The fountain was spraying water…More
John Pa 